NUNS AGAINST GREEN OR NAG by YeSiam Pennit special report

THE TULLA-TELLA NEWS TullaTella County News Flashed Friday, July 20, 2007 5:46:27 PM Nuns with guns? Farmer Ina Tiller (name withheld per request) stated, "They came out of nowhere with dem big black shoes and stamping on my greend beans, tomatoe plantes, knockin over my corn plants and stripping themed ears, I coulnt git near em cause dey had guns, and one of dem kept hollerin Jenit Reeno, I wast scart out of my wits." It is true they have begun a terror campaign overlooked by the present administration and are creating a wave of violent "stomping" as they term it to make a statement it seems of their plight and condition, one thing is for sure they are dangerous and armed. When we interviewed their leader a Ms Smakle Urhan,(name withheld by request) she stated, "We are sick and tired of this color green and how much evil influence it has in the world" "Do I detect a little "green" envy?" stated this reporter YeSiam Pennit "Do I detect someone with a red hand" countered the Ms Urhan, "Uh, I'm really sorry" stated YeSiam. Ms Urhan: "No, We are not envious but you answer this question why do some have so much green while others have so little, and when we see these fields with so much green well, it just infuriates us, I mean we get very angry." "What we need in this country are folks who are dedicated to changing the landscape colors of America, I mean whats wrong with black and white - we don't have a problem with that". YeSiam: But you are all Nuns, correct? Why do you want people to see you in this light, I mean don't you want to do the old addage of "do good unto others" or something like that? And by the way what is the name of your group? Ms Urhan: Yes, were Nuns you got a problem with that? We are doing good don't you believe that the green should be contributed among all and that each have more, you act as though were trying to rid the world of green, that is not the case.Our name or tag is Nuns Against Green or as you would probably refer to it as NAG or if it makes you feel better Nuns and Guns or again NAG, and I suppose you have a problem with that, don't you? What are you doing about all the green? Do you not care that some have only Yellow or Blue or Red or other colors? What exactly are you doing about it all? YeSiam: Whoa slow down. No I don't have a problem with your group or any thing you are doing but why stomp the farmers produce which he uses to feed the world? Ms Urhan: O yes, he'll feed the world and give the poor saps enough food to keep their miserable souls alive but he won't give them any green, maybe yellow, red or orange but not green, O no he won't share or part with the green therefore he must be made to do so and maybe at the cost of his precious little farm of oppression. YeSiam: Perhaps you are right, I mean, you do have the guns. Ms Urhan: Here is a song that may make you understand our plight a little better.

TABLE FOR TWO, SIR?

Excuse me dear lady, I seem to forget was it your table or another of which I did sit? My memory stirs not as I seek to find the place of presence in my mind. Perhaps if we talk - a little chat - I shall remember the table where I should have sat. Allow me the converstation my lady I urge you for many questions have I of which I wish to persue. Overlook dear lady the questions from my mind, Its so sad but I fear I am childish and immature most of the time. Choose a color from the rainbow and the Earth below and tell me the one you least like to behold, perhaps it's black or not as deep as a brown which you least know? Sir, might I call you friend, but I am afraid your question distrubs me so. Ask of any guest and they'll tell you I love all all colors even to the rainbow. I judge you not dear princess for I knew you all along. I know you enjoy the grey and black and equal too, showing no lack. You know me well good man and you seem to understand, But there is a quality in black and brown, good sir, it reminds one of dirt and an earthy ground. And green and red are gorgeous and pleasant I find, my friends wear them so well and sadly better than I most of the time. Yellow is adorable and feels comfortable witn me often I adorn myself with colors of these And my good sir when I wish to feel as a child as yourself, I am most pure and innocent in white. Yes indeed-yes-yes indeed I love all colors good man. and tell me, Oh yes, before our converstaion must end - of which of these do you hold in demand? Good lady so innocent we were you and I as a child I do remember now, before our chat became so wild, of which table I did belong or perhaps I knew all along. It was a good talk we've had and to leave you makes me very sad. Of all the colors we spoke I must say I too share them all some I have enjoyed less and some even more than I saw. Choose for me not green and address me not with red, hold for me blue, yes I think blue, maybe for evening chats a touch of yellow too. I mix well with yellow and blue and I must share my secret I like green I do. Now I see my table that I couldn't see before, It's hue is clear and it's still quite far. Farewell dear lady I must leave you behind your much to old for me and I'm still quiet childish in my mind.

YeSiam: I don't know it may seem old fashioned but don't you think people feel better about green if they work for it - I mean would they not appreciate it more? Urhan: Perhaps, but what do I care if they appreciate it more what is that to me, the only thing we are asking is share the green and put out the cat, the mouse is wild and his tail can be seen. Take that to your government icons and chew on the fat awhile. Yesiam: Thanks for the interview.