Full Post Posted Thursday, August 28, 2008 1:49 PM

Why You Can't Swat a Fly

Sharing Begley swatted at the fly and it resulted in her "twisted feet" after several years of therapy, she may one day recover - you go, girl!

Sharon Begley

The reason you can’t swat a fly is that, for a creature with a brain hardly deserving of the name, the fly is a marvel of calculating ability. But before I explain what scientists led by Michael Dickinson of the California Institute of Technology (that would be the Dickinson whose e-mail is "flyman") have learned about how the fly brain calculates the location of the looming swatter, formulates an escape plan and plants its legs in an optimal position to hop out of the way (all within about 100 milliseconds of spotting the swatter), let’s cut to the chase: the best way to swat a fly, Dickinson says, is “not to swat at the fly’s starting position, but rather to aim a bit forward of that to anticipate where the fly is going to jump when it first sees your swatter.” Where will it jump? Using high-resolution, high-speed imaging of flies in action, the scientists are reporting today online in Current Biology, they found that if the descending swatter (they used a 6-inch-diameter black disk, dropping at a 50-degree angle toward a fly) comes from in front of the fly, the fly moves its middle legs forward and leans back, then raises and extends its legs to push off backward, away from the swatter. Are you approaching your quarry from behind? The fly has a nearly 360-degree field of view and can see behind itself, so when it spies the swatter behind it it moves its middle legs a tiny bit backward and flies forward. With a swatter from the side, the fly keeps its middle legs still and leans in the opposite direction before jumping. The idea is to position its center of mass so that when the legs push off the fly will evade the swatter. “When the fly makes planning movements prior to takeoff, it takes into account its body position at the time it first sees the threat,” Dickinson says. “The fly somehow ‘knows’ whether it needs to make large or small postural changes to reach the correct preflight posture.” It does all this “long” (in fly time) before it takes off. “These movements are made very rapidly, within about 200 milliseconds” of seeing the swatter, says Dickinson, “but within that time the animal determines where the threat is coming from and activates an appropriate set of movements to position its legs and wings.” Don’t believe the folk wisdom that if you approach the fly really, really slowly so your swatter doesn’t stir the air then the fly won’t notice. The Caltech scientists found that flies can tell you’re coming by sight alone—and remember that 360-degrees of vision thing. It is Dickinson’s hope that discoveries about the fly’s neuronal processing will shed light on more complicated brains, not that his work will help humans kill flies better. His admiration for the little guys’ abilities, in fact, have made him hope that people will “think before they swat.” All Comments Posted Thursday, August 28, 2008 1:49 PM

Picture: Starting children when they are young allows the child to become adept at the technique of "Swatting" and will end a lifetime of frustration and psychological imbalance. Most psychologists agree that soon after birth a child should be introduced to the fly swat and as soon as they are able to hold the swat should be allowed to do so. Caleb illustrates the "right-handed sweep" pattern, just one of many taught at FATS.

Why You Can't Swat a Fly

Comment Section: By Sharon Begley Posted By: spantalk (August 29, 2008 at 11:23 PM) As you can tell by all the comments this is a very intricate art form and the reason there is a college devoted to this subject (there are 10 such colleges in Europe but only one in the USA). Currently Russia has applied to Europe to develop such a college in their country but because of the parlimentry regulations Russia has thus far been denied a college. Russia has become extremely angered at the European Council on Foreign Relations (E-CFR) as Europe had declared that only 12 colleges would be allowed world wide due to the extreme dangers of fly swatting and germ infestation. It is rumoured however, that Russia is perparing to knock out three of these colleges and become themselves the place for the number 10 college, only time will tell but it is a very hot issue with neighboring states Georgia,Azerbaijan and Ukraine (each having one college). A little off the subject matter, today marks (8-30-08) the anniversary of the death of a fellow student whom died trying to swat a regular common housefly from the roof edge of the FATS campus building on North campus (FATS - Flies Are To Swat) on July 24, 2006, and I would like to, out of respect, ask for a moment of silence! A special Thank You to Ms. Sharon Begley for bringing this information to the forefront of the public and for her continued support, both with information and financial support or as Rush would say "Kudo's". http://themousecried.blogspot.com/ Report Abuse Posted By: djphoto (August 29, 2008 at 11:23 PM) I would like to submit that a fly buzzing around in the house at night always is attracted towards light. It usually ends up in the bathroom as other lights are shut off. Simply watch it land, flick off the light and smack it in the dark with the swatter. If you miss, flick the light on and then off and it lands again. Hardly ever miss when you zero in on them. Report Abuse Posted By: debbieemc (August 29, 2008 at 10:56 PM) I don't even use a fly swatter. I use a towel and swat them down in mid flight. I just killed one a few minutes ago. We had an infestation (still have no idea how we got so many in the house when nobody left a door open that day) a couple of months ago and I killed about a dozen in one hour. Research is a waste of money on this project when there are more worthy and life improving areas like curing cancer. Thati is where they should focused not on "why we cannot kill the fly" Report Abuse Posted By: GeorgeWA (August 29, 2008 at 10:54 PM) When I was a kid, a friend had a pet lizard. We would go to the sunlit garage wall in the alley, just above the trash can, to catch flies attracted to the fragrance and the bright white surface. By slowly moving both hands, one from each side, toward the fly, its multi-angle eyes are confused. You can then swiftly and simultaneously move your hands in the direction of the fly, and slightly upward and ahead of it, to either slap them together for a kill (not a problem to a 13 year old boy!), or make that same move while forming an escape proof chamber by cupping your hands at the end of your motion. Then you can dump the fly into the lizard's aquarium, slam down the lid before the poor fly gets is bearings, and have fun watching the reptile's rapid tongue to go work! Fun! Awesome fun! That was our version of a video game in 1960! Report Abuse Posted By: johnwhicks (August 29, 2008 at 10:52 PM) How much money was spent determining that a fly will actually not sit still and allow you to kill it? In other words, how much money went into telling us a fly as a survival instinct which is found in all living creatures? Flies are particularly bad this year around our place for whatever reason. It took some time but I eventually taught my wife how to get the little suckers. She missed over and over again until I showed her how to do it. With just a little practice she now hits them far more than she misses. I can honestly say I never miss. Despite what the article said, the best and about only way is in fact to move in slowly. If they wise up and move away, you simply wait till they land again and move in slowly again. I do not swat unless I can come down directly on top of them from about a foot away. I never miss. Back in the dueling days, it was not the fastest guy who won. It was the one who took the time to take careful aim. Same principal applies, just takes a little patience. They tested coming at all different angles which are a complete and total waste of time. It does not matter what angle the fly is positioned relative to the horizon, you simply position the swatter so you are always coming down perpendicular to the surface he is on (i.e. you always come down straight onto his back). Maybe I can get the grant money they wasted and put it to good use like feeding the children that go to bed hungry every night right here in America. Report Abuse Posted By: jacrau (August 29, 2008 at 10:43 PM) How much money did this "scientific" company get to come up with this hooey! I have always heard, since a child, that a fly leaps baclwards and that if you swat BEHIND the fly, you will get it. I have always done this and have not missed in over 70 years! Shame on Cal Tech for taking the public's money for this report. Graham W Miller Report Abuse Posted By: pablohno (August 29, 2008 at 10:42 PM) Yo - Put da swatter away...Here's what ya do...Bring your hands in slowly extended and aligned in a clapping position and about 3 inches above the fly's position...When your hands are about 10 inches apart it is time to affect the "clap of death." Works every time...As that fly lifts off it can't move fast enought to avoid the closing hands...Remember to wash up and finish your egg sandwich! Report Abuse Posted By: spantalk (August 29, 2008 at 10:40 PM) I went to a fly swatting academy located in Gatlinburg Tennessee (near Dollywood's Dolly Parton) and while it does not have a large number of students (currently 245 students with a ratio of 1 teacher per 30 students) you can however, graduate in 4 years and earn a MDF degree (Make Dead Fly). I did not realize how complicated it is and has been for people to kill flies especially with swats until I enrolled in the college. It is extremely detailed in both design and curricula with a book required reading every 3 months, with a total of about 16 books. The technique used is similiar to the CSI units and requires disection of the fly and it's larvae, the maggot. In the research one learns where flys live, their pattern of flight,how they transfer disease,the different type of flies throughout the world and size range, and much more to numerous to name. The college has a basketball team called the Tsetse's,and a football team called the Bots,baseball team called the Swatters,as well as swim team,chess team etc...,. School colors are medium gray and maroon blood red. We have not as of yet made the Olympics or competed as a national team as most students are skeptical of the degree and where one would apply the vocation after graduation. If interested in attending the college and it's graduate degree program (also V.A. accredited) you can attain more information at the website - http://themousecried.blogspot.com/ - as our team mascot is the "mouse". Report Abuse Posted By: Rambo John J (August 29, 2008 at 10:11 PM) Fly's are stupid bust dem in day *%__@_#_(Expletive deleted)

Report Abuse Posted By: makesyouwonder (August 29, 2008 at 9:49 PM) Despite all the research into why your can't swat a fly I believe it comes down to being smarter than the fly. People have been swatting flies successfully for years. I used to catch flies to feed my pet turtles by just cupping them as they lit on the ends of our willow tree branches. Remember that first "Karate Kid" where Mr. Miyagi told Daniel that if you catch a fly with chopsticks you can do anything? I have an ex husband that actually caught a fly with chopsticks. Maybe our tax dollars should be spent on researching the truth of that? Report Abuse Posted By: calicocat (August 29, 2008 at 9:44 PM) With all due respect to Michael Dickinson,I disagree with his findings that were in this article. I have killed many a fly in my lifetime...and yes...I did approach very slowly and usually got the fly I was after. The slow appraoch has worked many many times for me. I figured that if I approached slowly so as not to attract attention (they have great vision...yes), then I would be able to get them with the swatter. It works pretty well. Thank you for letting me voice my opinion. Report Abuse Posted By: Jillay (August 29, 2008 at 9:37 PM) I agree with rockinfire7....I also believe they have a blind spot because instead of using a fly swatter I clap my hands about 2 inches above them. They seem to fly straight up so I usually get them. So it makes sense to me that they may actually have a blind spot. Maybe the scientist should test the theory. If your hands are about 2 inches above and you don't get them vary the spacing as your either to low or too high. Report Abuse Posted By: gearhead4life (August 29, 2008 at 8:48 PM) What's more challenging, and rewarding is catching a fly by hand. The difficult part is trying to make sure they are killed, which is the ultimate goal of catching, or swatting flies. I have caught many flies by hand, then shaken them vigorously to see if indeed they are caught, only to have them fly away when I open my hand. Imitating a fast-ball throw against the floor or wall seems to do the trick most of the time. Trying to squeeze the life out of them isn't as successful with fat fingers! Besides, who wants fly guts all over their hands anyway? The little battery-powered fly cookers that look like racquetball rackets are entertaining too, if you like he smell of cooked wings. Report Abuse Posted By: j.n (August 29, 2008 at 8:45 PM) If that is true,why is so easy to catch a fly if you go from the side,I do not buy that research. Somone probably got a government grant to come up with this non sense,I can catch flies all day long with my hand if I go from the side,if he is so fast why does he move out of the way. Report Abuse Posted By: rocknfire7 (August 29, 2008 at 8:41 PM) Flies can see 360 degrees around themselves but they CAN NOT see directly above themselves. They DO have a blind spot.. Try it ! You can take a long toothpick and stab the little sucker before he knows what hit him. ( As long as the pick is directly above the fly and doesn't enter his area of vision) Report Abuse Posted By: rocknfire7 (August 29, 2008 at 8:38 PM) Flies can see 360 degrees around themselves but they CAN NOT see directly above themselves. They DO have a blind spot.. Try it ! You can take a long toothpick and stab the little sucker before he knows what hit him. ( As long as the pick is directly above the fly and doesn't enter his area of vision) Report Abuse Posted By: lrgallion@roadrunner.com (August 29, 2008 at 8:38 PM) The best way to "swat" a fly is to place your hands on either side of him (or her) at the same time. They seem unable to cope with two things coming towards them at the same time in a non threatening or "non-swatting" manner. Slowly move your hands to about 10 inches apart and then clap them together. Now you may think, "Eew, Gross, squashed fly on my hands," but no. The fly will fall in a heap as soon as you open your hands, still in one piece. In fact he won't look like he's even hurt. Trust me, it happens every time. I assume they are only unconscious from the concussion and pick them up and throw them out the door. Report Abuse Posted By: cardman (August 29, 2008 at 8:19 PM) (in a tiny, high pitched voice) Help me! Help me! Help meeeee! Report Abuse Posted By: Chris Possessky (August 29, 2008 at 7:54 PM) This is interesting and may be true, but I've caught flies in my hand and I've swatted them with my bare hand. Just like any other athletic event, a superior athlete, with better skill, will prevail. I had a friend in college - going back 24 years - who could catch flies in his hand whenever he wanted. Maybe this energy exploring neuronal processing would be better focused on finding a cure for one of the many cancers that take human lives every day. Report Abuse Posted By: Chris Possessky (August 29, 2008 at 7:53 PM) This is interesting and may be true, but I've caught flies in my hand and I've swatted them with my bare hand. Just like any other athletic event, a superior athlete, with better skill, will prevail. I had a friend in college - going back 24 years - who could catch flies in his hand whenever he wanted. Maybe this energy exploring neuronal processing would be better focused on finding a cure for one of the many cancers that take human lives every day. Report Abuse Posted By: intelligencia (August 29, 2008 at 7:40 PM) Interesting discussion boys... but i thought one of the main contributing factors in "el attempto futale" was in part due to the aerodynamics of the instrument being used. For example, any solid object moved through the air, pushes the air creating turbulance. The turbulance propels any objects away from the solid object. The more velocity of the object the greater the turbulance, the more force to push objects out of the way. An example of this involves the sideways "push" you feel when passing a truck on the hwy. Poking holes in the instrument, such as in a fly swatter, decreases the drag and resistance which results in a decrease in turbulance in the air stream in front of the swatter. This eventually results in "la muerte de la mosca". We have way too much time on our hands... Report Abuse Posted By: intelligencia (August 29, 2008 at 7:38 PM) Interesting discussion boys... but i thought one of the main contributing factors in "el attempto futale" was in part due to the aerodynamics of the instrument being used. For example, any solid object moved through the air, pushes the air creating turbulance. The turbulance propels any objects away from the solid object. The more velocity of the object the greater the turbulance, the more force to push objects out of the way. An example of this involves the sideways "push" you feel when passing a truck on the hwy. Poking holes in the instrument, such as in a fly swatter, decreases the drag and resistance which results in a decrease in turbulance in the air stream in front of the swatter. This eventually results in "la muerte de la mosca". We have way too much time on our hands... Report Abuse Posted By: Kajun1102 (August 29, 2008 at 7:33 PM) Poor Simon, Speed is the factor in the newspaper, not airflow. So you don't need holes if you are fast enough. So reach into your "Sinister Bar" and take another swig of stupidity. Report Abuse Posted By: redhart44 (August 29, 2008 at 7:16 PM) A Flea and a Fly in a flue were caught So what could they do? Said the Fly, " Let us Flee" "Let us fly ", said the flea So they flew through a flaw in the flue Report Abuse Posted By: Simon_Bar_Sinister (August 29, 2008 at 6:42 PM) Kajun1102... Did you actually read the article? Holes in the fly swatter are to cut down on wind resistance, thereby making swat speed faster. Where are the holes in a newspaper? Sheesh! Reach into the beer fridge and get a can of "get a clue". When the scientists can predict what path the fly takes from point A-B then I'll be impressed. Considering the fly has a brain about the size of half the knuckleheads here (not the half I am in, though) you wouldn't think it hard to do. Just goes to show you, how complicated even the tiniest of life forms really is. Even the most powerful computer we have could not predict the path of a fly (remember the size of his brain). Report Abuse Posted By: alchirico (August 29, 2008 at 6:29 PM) The arguments about the wisdom and appropriate use of research funds aside, I have heard and validated on my own the premise that flys have a blind spot directly in fromt of their faces. Using this blind spot, I have been very secussful at knocking them out with a flick of my finger provided that I approach them from directly in front of them. Once they're knocked out, it's real easy to pull their *%__@_#_(Expletive deleted)king little wings off and then incinerate them with a magnifying glass. Report Abuse Posted By: waymon poodle (August 29, 2008 at 6:21 PM) I'd rather read Toonamint of Champions. Report Abuse Posted By: Pajoob (August 29, 2008 at 6:21 PM) Try this next time you want to kill a fly. I actually dissect it. Take out your trusty pocket knife and real, I mean real, slow, come down on top of the little disease carrier. When you are about 1/32 of an inch above, whack it. Works every time. Report Abuse Posted By: Kajun1102 (August 29, 2008 at 6:20 PM) Flies have little hairs all over them, enabling them to feel the slightest change in the air. That's why fly-swatters are made with holes in them. Speed is also a factor, thus making "SpeedBugs" rolled up newspaper a handy swatter also. But regardless the technique, I feel it is a waste of time and money to focus on a flies ability to take off fast, or in certain directions. After all they only live for a couple of weeks, if that. Maybe we should put some flies on a cancer patient and see what they come up with on that............(he says with disgust!) Report Abuse Posted By: mikegg (August 29, 2008 at 6:11 PM) great story... Speedbug you are truely a fool. This "useless" crap is what will keep our technical/scientific edge as I could see uses for this in computer and robotic technologies both for domestic and military use. I would suggest you look up random things that goverment funds have helped to make part of our everyday lives...such as the internet (which you apparently can and do use). Report Abuse Posted By: SpeedBug (August 29, 2008 at 5:34 PM) The pesky critters rarely escape the crash of my rolled up newspaper. Knowing we have scientists wasting research dollars on such useless crap has me concerned. And I can just imagine our government probably supported this fly research with grants funded by the taxpayers. Report Abuse Posted By: eonchontay (August 29, 2008 at 5:32 PM) I always get my flies! Flies take off BACKWARD. So I always aim to to the rear of the fly. Works everytime! Report Abuse Posted By: kettle_black44 (August 29, 2008 at 5:25 PM) Knuckleheads....I kill flies with chop sticks all the time. Report Abuse Posted By: aprilskies (August 29, 2008 at 5:24 PM) really why are 'scientist spending all this time on fly swatting techniques when they are obviously very intelligent. If we can't apply this to humans and only flies then these SMART people could be spending their time using their large brains to finding cures, something that truly matters Report Abuse Posted By: __@#%_(expletive deleted) long (August 29, 2008 at 5:21 PM) I can *%__@_#_(Expletive deleted) in the air and kill a fly mid stream.. Report Abuse Posted By: BrotherLou (August 29, 2008 at 5:16 PM) I know it's a different matter when the fly is committed to a specific fly path. More than one boxer has been reputed to be able to pick a fly out of the air with two fingers, a feat I myself have accomplished more than once. Going to school in a much hotter climate than Boston, I had a teacher once who had a phobia against flies, he used to smack them out of the air with a yellow HB pencil he kept handy on his desk for that specific purpose. I kid you not. Report Abuse Posted By: swmn99 (August 29, 2008 at 4:56 PM) I don't know what they are talking about....I hardly ever miss "swatting" a fly with either a fly swatter or my hand. Report Abuse

http://blog.newsweek.com/blogs/labnotes/archive/2008/08/28/why-you-can-t-swat-a-fly.aspx

AFP/File Photo: Experimental archaeologist Metin Eren, from the University of Exeter in southwest England (Left Photo)

Neanderthals were not 'stupid,' says new research Tue Aug 26, 11:09 AM ET

LONDON (AFP) - Neanderthals were not as stupid as they have been portrayed, according to new research Tuesday showing their stone tools were as good as those made by the early ancestors of modern humans, Homo sapiens.

AFP/File Photo: Experimental archaeologist Metin Eren, from the University of Exeter in southwest England

The findings by a team of scientists at British and US universities challenge the assumption that the ancestors of people living today drove Neanderthals into extinction by producing better tools. The research could lead to a fresh search for explanations about why Neanderthals vanished from Europe around 28,000 years ago, after living alongside modern humans for some 10,000 years. Experimental archaeologist Metin Eren (See picture above), from the University of Exeter in southwest England, said: "Our research disputes a major pillar holding up the long-held assumption that Homo sapiens were more advanced than Neanderthals. "It is time for archaeologists to start searching for other reasons why Neanderthals became extinct while our ancestors survived. According to the family line located in Gatlinburg,TN., the Neanderthals chose to go underground because of the "stupidity" of the homosapiens who would hunt down and try to kill or capture the Neanderthal and calling them "Bigfoot" or "Sasquatch". This forced the intervention of each member of the society to keep one "foot" ahead of the hunters from the homosapien class to recapture any of the "murdered" corpse of the Neanderthal or to rescue those whom were captured and setting them free. The "dead" Neanderthal were quickly buried in an undisclosed place, so as not to alert the homosapiens at large to hunt and capture more Neanderthals. This is why today it is still a great mystery of the unknown "Bigfoot" and efforts to find him, have eluded the populace, to keep the Neanderthal from extinction. Until such a time arises that Neanderthal is accepted for his intelligence they shall remain reclusive and hidden from society. Their religion is close and guarded so as not to openly declare their views. The only sure thing we know of their religion is that they are called the "Hiddenites" and very secretive about their form of whom or what they worship. They have, however, been associated with space flight and it is supposed that some of them (probably 27,000 +) escaped the earth and may indeed be on the planet Mars, they await the soon return of their "brethren" to whom they give credit that one day their return will bring peace upon the earth.

Tools and the Neanderthal

"Technologically speaking, there is no clear advantage of one tool over the other. When we think of Neanderthals, we need to stop thinking in terms of 'stupid' or 'less advanced' and more in terms of 'different,'" Eren said. The team from the University of Exeter, Southern Methodist University in Dallas, Texas State University and the Think Computer Corporation, spent three years producing stone tools. They recreated stone tools known as 'flakes,' which were wider tools originally used by both Neanderthals and Homo sapiens, and 'blades,' a narrower stone tool later adopted by Homo sapiens. To test whether the Homo sapiens' tools were superior, the team analysed the data to compare the number of tools produced, how much cutting-edge was created, the amount of raw material required and the durability of the tools. They found there was no statistical difference between the efficiency of the two technologies and in some respects the flakes favoured by Neanderthals did the job better than the blades adopted by Homo sapiens. The research, published in the Journal of Human Evolution, begs the question of why Homo sapiens switched from the type of tool technology used by the Neanderthals to something different but no more efficient. The switch to a more streamlined technology during the time that Homo sapiens began colonising Europe may have given the toolmakers a shared identity which in turn fostered social cohesion, Eren said. "Colonising a continent isn't easy. Colonising a continent during the Ice Age is even harder. So, for early Homo sapiens colonising Ice Age Europe, a new shared and flashy-looking technology might serve as one form of social glue by which larger social networks were bonded," he said. "Thus, during hard times these larger social networks might act like a type of life insurance, ensuring exchange and trade among members of the same team." Other studies have claimed that Neanderthals may have died out because they struggled with changing conditions brought by increasingly cold temperatures, failing to adapt their hunting methods when species such as mammoth and bison fled south and a once-forested Europe changed into a sparsely vegetated landscape during the last Ice Age.

More recent

Think Computer Corporation, in a recent announcement has disclosed their "newest" venture to understand more better the life and ways of the Neanderthal. A ten year study to be conducted by the top 20 leading scientists at Think Computer Corporation will be placed throughout the European and African Continents to live from the land in order to more fully understand the "bathroom habitats" of the Neanderthal and their burial of their "dung". After ten years of wondering around Europe/Africa we will then extricate or dig-up the "dung (or what the homosapiens refer to as a #2)". We will be able to see the path which Neanderthal would have taken across Europe and Africa and what is diet consisted of and how often burial became a necessity. We will be able to understand much more of the type of tools he used for burial technique and if he had to return often to his burial plot of "dung" which is what we suspect at this time. How many "dung beetles" we find at these sightings at the end of the ten years will inform us on how soon he covered Europe and Africa and hopefully, help us to more fully understand how he managed to find his route into the America's inparticuilarily, Gatlinburg. Before these twenty scientists will make it into the "wild", they will have to spend a year eating nuts and berries and be caretakers in ten different "zoo's" being assigned two to a zoo, to observe how the chimps and monkeys bury their "done" for imitation purposes.

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PENTAGON: MILITARY STRIKE AGAINST RUSSIA

Above left: Russian President (Right) - Russian President Mevedev - Center Picture: US Secretary Condeleezza Rice - Above Right: Russian envoy Dmitry Rogozin - Below: Two unidentified (Sarah Davis,Marlena Mouskowitz) take a nap during the "infamous" -sitdown - by the government militaries worldwide - see story below.

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Bulletin: Breaking News 1 hour 7 minutes ago PENTAGON: MILITARY STRIKE AGAINST RUSSIA - ALLIES IN DISSARAY Department of Defense - Pentagon: Sunday August 24,2008 In a joint session of the Pentagon, with meetings with top ranking Congressional and Senatorial members, it was disclosed that the USA Military - all branches will strike Russia and any country that allies themself with Russia including China and Iran. Being very disappointed with the lack of progress of human rights campaign in China's hosting of the Olympics 2008, a very disgruntled American President (who wishes to be unnamed at this writting) stated, "We put stock in our young athletes that through their involvement with international competition they, that is the youth representing the USA would bring more "human rights" recognition into China, but quite frankly, they failed each and every one of us and failed to acheive human rights". With the invasion of the Republic of Georgia and our understanding that Russia has set up a Puppet government and that Russia is only "pulling back" to attack the other "two breakaway republics" and setup their own puppet government, we have decided to "strike" Russia and any of it's allies who align themselves with Russia" stated a very, tired President W (we will call him "W" so as not to reveal his true identity). One of the top 6 star Generals (ironically there are only 6 at this present time) General H. Al Bouwdit stated, "I think we are making a decision we will regret very soon, however, I was overruled by the other legislatures and five of my peers and I will follow their directions to the letter." "At 0800 hours this Friday August 29, 2008, we will commence a "strike" against Russia and those that align themselves with Russia - we have notified the United Nations and Russian leaders including Russian President Dmitry Medvedev Russian President Dmitry Medvedev, above right, listens to his Syrian counterpart Bashar Assad, during a meeting in the presidential residence at the Russian Black Sea resort of Sochi on Thursday, Aug. 21, 2008.( and the Russian envoy Dmitry Rogozin. (Below) In a statement that seemed somewhat targeted toward Russia, the Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, visablly upset and angry stated, "You have mocked and laughed at the USA - Envoy Dmitry Rogozin - U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, left, and Poland's Foreign Minister …(Picture below) - in your own words, "We hope it will be a balanced and responsible decision and that the US will not break all the glassware in our house." and “The mountain gave birth to a mouse.” however, after this friday we will see whom laughs Mr Envoy, if that is indeed your real name." "As of Friday all military branches, Navy, Airforce, Marines, and the Army, along with other government offices both public and private, including Nuclear plants, will stage (a first of it's kind anywhere in the free world) a strike, a physical sit down by all personel for the entire day from 0800 hours beginning Friday until 0800 hours ending Saturday, August 30, 2008. The only Military that will not and I repeat will not sit down in protest will be those in countries involved in war or warzones determined by the USA will be excluded for obvious reasons.", stated Secretary Rice. "Don't dare think Mr. Russian President Dmitry Medvedev that we can not duplicate this sit down in the future we can and we most assuredly will if the need arises and you do not follow guidelines set forth by the United Nations". The Mouse Comment: Things indeed appear to be shaken up in a world torn by can cutters and bombs throughout the European Continent - tense times call for tense prayers. - Le Mouse A Page One Production Themousecried. http://themousecried.blogspot.com © All Rights Reserved You have the right to copy and all of the Mouse with our gratitude and permission. Slogan: "Что-то типа Новой Газеты на английском языке." (Translation: Something like Novaya Gazeta, but in English).